I was conservative, and taking risks were a no no for me. However, strangely enough, having small talks with people I met for the first time came naturally. I didn't know their personality, and they did not know mine. I was starting all over again, it felt good, but there was this sense of uneasiness and loneliness .After days and days, those " friendly" talks did not become any more intimate. There was this barrier between everyone that I interacted with. I was trying to find my place in the school, and I was eager to do it quick.
Weeks later, I knew people by name and I was starting to settle. People's personalities were becoming more apparent and I had an idea to whom I could hang out with and whom I couldn't. I was still lonely at times, I didn't have that kind of special bond I had in my old school with anyone here. But at least, I wasn't referred to as the " new girl' anymore. The following months after, everything was better.
I was exposed to so many new things, things I would never have imagined myself doing. A lot of things were done out of my comfort zone, which included talking to people I wasn't familiar too, anchoring the school news production and performing solo drama pieces in front of an all male class. Needless to say, I've stuffed up many things hahaha but my self confidence has definitely been boosted . Although there are countless times where I've chickened out on amazing opportunities I could have grabbed, parties I've avoided going because I didn't feel ready, and just missing out on plenty of social opportunities.
For what I know, I've tried at least, and I wouldn't be who I am now if I hadn't.
Yupp, the beginning is always the hardest for anything and everything . It starts with the motivation. The incentive and push to make yourself step over your comfort zone. It's easy to give up in the middle too, but what a waste it would be after you've come so far already. Never underestimate how powerful mental strength has.So powerful to the extent that it surpasses physical strength. Keep pushing yourself mentally until you've reached the stage where your body and mind automatically accustoms itself to whatever you're doing.
They're no regrets for making yourself a better person are there? Just regrets for not trying. If you do have those regrets, it's never too late to reverse them.
Thank you so much for reading x
I've neglected my blog so many times, but I wouldn't live with myself if I just gave up like that.
I'll keep posting
Written with love,
p.s the url of this blog has been changed;)